Death of a Blogger

March 25, 2010 · 16 comments

I died three days ago. What a lucky SOB I am; I simply went to sleep and stayed that way. Sorta. I’m stalled here In Limbo. No, not the dance, the state of suspension, the intermediate, the cosmic waiting room. Now, hold your horses, I know you want to know what the hell is over here. Yup, there’s that hell thing to deal with to. I’ll get to that in a moment. Crap, my blog is dead too, or it will be soon. I don’t even remember the last time I wrote a post. And my tweets! My followers, all 47,289 of them… . There must be massive consternation about me on Twitter.

It occurs to me that I may have dropped a couple of F bombs on my priorities back over there. Ya know, I had this list somewhere, a bucket list. Most of my friends didn’t know I kept a bucket list. Hell, I forgot it myself. How did things over there, in life, get so skewed? As I think about it, there is no one thing or person to accuse … except me.

The idea of a list of things to do before I died was of course not exclusive to me. I met a man on a mountain who told me … long story, that doesn’t matter. I got the idea around 1995, and started my bucket list. Fifty things, I thought, fifty things for my list and add to it as I work that down. Life (and death) are spurious events. Apologies to Longfellow, “…things are not what they seem.” I toiled over my list day and night, and finally came up with ten items. Ten items. Now I can easily think of a hundred things. No, things are not what they seem.

Over the years, my wife helped with the list. She paid more attention to me and my wants and wishes than I did. Till the day I die I won’t forget the hot-air balloon ride… make that for eternity.
Even so, with a mere ten things, the list was never completed. Sidetracked. That damned Interweb thing got me sidetracked somewhere in the mid-nineties.

It was yesterday that I realized I had expired, dead, deader, deadest. What a sobering thought that was. Moving about, watching people, invisible. Oh, you want to know about hell? I suggest you read Dante’s Inferno for more insight into the dark side over here.

I never planned my funeral. I had all the physical aspects in order, it was the other parts I had left undone. Too late now. My wife will see to it, as always. I’ll miss her more than anything else on either side. She was the love of my… Wait, there’s my daughter Stella and Sammy my son. I can hear Sammy talking.

“Dad was OK, ya know, he…”
And Stella,
“He was on that damned computer all the time. Blogging, writing, twitting.”
“Dad loved all that Internet crap. That was his life.”
“Yes, maybe we should put that on his headstone.
‘Dad – Blogger, Tweeter and Nerdy Dweeb’.”
“You’re upset because he didn’t give you enough attention?”
“Aren’t you?”
“I dunno, he left me that Mac Pro, and …”
“You know, you’re a lot like dad. You think you’re going to be big man blogger, and…”
“Oh! Yeah! And that damned iPhone, you sleep with it don’t you?”

Kids! Wait! None of that is important. No! I don’t won’t ‘Blogger’ on my headstone, that’s not going to be my epitaph. Crap, they can’t hear me. It’s too late for me to make any decisions about me. I’m dead. Expired like a never read magazine. What’s that?

“Dearly departed. We are gathered here to honor your tweets and posts…”

{ 14 comments… read them below or add one }

Pete March 25, 2010 at 12:18 pm

He's not dead, he's just offline…

Hal Brown March 25, 2010 at 12:46 pm

LOL! Very good Pete. I wish someone would finish this sentence.

Old bloggers never die, they just ??

Mari March 25, 2010 at 2:29 pm

Snickering and agreeing with you, Hal. Oh, but the pressure of all that writing and reading on that “interweb.”

Karen March 25, 2010 at 3:11 pm

And, so, what have we learned from this story today?

Maybe I should step away from the computer and get a life? Before it's too late? :-)

Hal Brown March 25, 2010 at 3:32 pm

Hi Karen,

Hopefully, we have learned to set priorities. What is most important to you, your virtual life or your real life? And how much and where do the two cross with each other?

Personally, I will be doing just that as warm weather gets closer – stepping away from the computer.

Thanks for your comment. It adds a dynamic to this post that makes me think even more about “Before it's too late.”

Hal Brown April 7, 2010 at 12:49 pm

Thanks for your input Karen. Spring has sprung and so have I. :)

Kevin M. March 25, 2010 at 10:43 pm

Great reminder here Hal! Excellent story!

PS I dugg, stumbled and rt'ed this post too! :)

Hal Brown March 26, 2010 at 2:16 am

Thanks Kevin.

Kissie March 28, 2010 at 1:03 am

Yes, I always try to keep the important things important. This is a great perspective for those who sometimes lose their way and sight.

An epitaph is a belated advertisement for a line of goods that has been discontinued. – Irvin S. Cobb

“Old bloggers never die, they just retweet the younger ones.”

Hal Brown March 28, 2010 at 10:54 am

Hi Kissie,
Love that quote. And finally someone finished the old bloggers line. Thanks for your support. And your friendship.

missy March 30, 2010 at 2:10 am

Old bloggers never die, they just keep making all the big bucks. ;)

zazo March 30, 2010 at 3:53 am

Old bloggers never die, they just keep on blogging from paradise.
Hi Ohal, great story and a reminder to all of us techies, geeks and bloggers. Yes, Its hard sometimes to balance our real and virtual life, we need to set priorities, goals and aim of our life in more balanced way. Anything 'over” is harmful so is internet stuff.

Hal Brown March 30, 2010 at 9:50 am

Not from this site they don't. Thanks Missy. :)

Hal Brown March 30, 2010 at 9:53 am

I should hold a contest and give millions to the best “old bloggers never die…” line. Thanks for stopping by Zazo.

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